Its late, and i cant sleep. Thoughts of death are floating around in that big melon of a head of mine. I cant help but shake the feeling that im alone in this world. Or even in finding a point in living. Ive come across this many times in my pathetic life, but one constant allways remains. Im to much of a pussy to pull that trigger, or to tighten that noose.
Im getting fat again, big surprise. The most I weighed in highschool was 245, and i believe just by looking at myself, and not being able to see my dick, that ive surpassed that by at least 25 pounds. Not being able to see your cock is quite the mind trip, but to me as long as I can touch it, im hunky dory. But how many pounds before that goes away? I find myself needing a reason to be healthy, and a reason to live. When you find that, its the most amazing thing. You find yourself throwing your inhabitions to the wind, and going for broke. And for the first time in years, this had been the best summer of my life, until she cheated on me. Now for the first 2 weeks i was a wreck and i admit apart of me wanted to die, but i got over that cunt and realized something. I dont want to give her the satisfaction of knowing she was the reason for my demise. Karma has a far better plan for her. Incestual Impregnation is my guess, and a good thing too shes not to bright and alittle on the young side, with her family envolved i think the baby will turn out half retarded instead of the full on drool on the face booger in the mouth tard.
However, it cant go unsaid that maybe she has alittle to do with my situation. I admit that with the thought of happiness being thrown to the ground ive found myself without motivation for change. There is a tredmill in my living room, and the amount of times ive gotten on it, is probably the amount of legal mexicans in this country. Zero.
Tommarow is what i say, well as tommarow comes around i get fatter, my dick gets smaller, and the "dredmill" sits unused. So now I sit and wait for the thing thats going to make me shave and do laundry. The thing thattl make me get on the tredmill so i dont end up like one of those guys at Hooters who thinks the girls like him. So i dont become any more addicted to porn, so i wont rub my dick raw.
Ill be waiting here unnemployed, unhappy and unslim, for that chance to change, for that chance to be someone, for the chance to sleep unerupted becuause the bed is to soft and your belly is to big.
Oh woe is me. I guess ill just go back to jerkin off...
.............to be continued.........................
Im getting fat again, big surprise. The most I weighed in highschool was 245, and i believe just by looking at myself, and not being able to see my dick, that ive surpassed that by at least 25 pounds. Not being able to see your cock is quite the mind trip, but to me as long as I can touch it, im hunky dory. But how many pounds before that goes away? I find myself needing a reason to be healthy, and a reason to live. When you find that, its the most amazing thing. You find yourself throwing your inhabitions to the wind, and going for broke. And for the first time in years, this had been the best summer of my life, until she cheated on me. Now for the first 2 weeks i was a wreck and i admit apart of me wanted to die, but i got over that cunt and realized something. I dont want to give her the satisfaction of knowing she was the reason for my demise. Karma has a far better plan for her. Incestual Impregnation is my guess, and a good thing too shes not to bright and alittle on the young side, with her family envolved i think the baby will turn out half retarded instead of the full on drool on the face booger in the mouth tard.
However, it cant go unsaid that maybe she has alittle to do with my situation. I admit that with the thought of happiness being thrown to the ground ive found myself without motivation for change. There is a tredmill in my living room, and the amount of times ive gotten on it, is probably the amount of legal mexicans in this country. Zero.
Tommarow is what i say, well as tommarow comes around i get fatter, my dick gets smaller, and the "dredmill" sits unused. So now I sit and wait for the thing thats going to make me shave and do laundry. The thing thattl make me get on the tredmill so i dont end up like one of those guys at Hooters who thinks the girls like him. So i dont become any more addicted to porn, so i wont rub my dick raw.
Ill be waiting here unnemployed, unhappy and unslim, for that chance to change, for that chance to be someone, for the chance to sleep unerupted becuause the bed is to soft and your belly is to big.
Oh woe is me. I guess ill just go back to jerkin off...
.............to be continued.........................
